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Simple Pleasures

A funny thing happens when you spend 4 years of your life with an animal with irritable bowel syndrome.

You begin paying a whole lot more attention to poop.

More specifically, to that of the animal with the IBS. Only careful scanning of your pet's spore can allow you to devine how much liquid red crap will be in store for you the next morning.

As a rule, solid is good. I say as a rule, since the dog poop right before the onset often begins pretty solid.

You musten get your hopes up at the first sight of firmness, as, you might just be witnessing the passing of the poop cork, the last vestige of solidity, barely holding back the torrent of persuasive liquid feces.

And so, after years of conditioning, the sight of warm, coherent crap still inspires in me a certain amount of relief.

For I can be fairly certain, that among the various booby traps of life, puddles of rancid poo with a hint of blood, are simply not in the cards.