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Iran is currently going through a renaissance in film.

While here, in the free country, the best we seem to be able to do, is churn out sequels and shows based on theme park rides. And, then the sequels...

However, today, I saw a preview that simply put me over the edge.

They are making a sequel to "The Whole Nine Yards" called, get ready for it, "The Whole Ten Yards".

Now, I'm not sure what sort of mastermind is behind the "Whole X Yards" Franchise, but there seem to be only two options.

  1. Their goal is to rehash trite and uninspired tripe to us until our souls collapse under the meaninglessly, interbred art that is quickly filling our collective cultural lungs.
  2. Writer Mitchell Kapner gives tremendous hand jobs

In either case, they must be stopped (well, one case more than the other).

Back to Iran for a bit. Apparently, the key to Iran's recent upsurge in quality of films, involves the fact that the state can take away any film maker's right to make films, at any time.

I believe we need to work on a similar system here, one, preferrably powered by angry mobs, versed in the art of causing pain. Which, given the state of our schools, is probably too much to ask.

One bad movie can be forgotten. But the second a concept is rehashed again, it becomes an undead bad movie, which are much harder to kill than feeble, living bad movies.

Tell me, do you think we can really weather a second coming of "The Country Bears"?

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